Mindfulness in the Moment

A client came into my office with her counselor. The client appeared very anxious and a bit agitated. She had not gotten her dose of Medication from the clinic nurses yet. She was here to sign some releases of information to her doctors and had previously been resistant to doing so for fear of losing her anxiety medications.

This is a client on methadone and I work at a rehabilitation clinic primarily for persons addicted to opiates and are prescribed methadone treatment. On the surface, one may see an angry, ill-mannered addict who is most difficult to deal with. She refused to listen to any conversation and stated she wanted to ‘get dosed’ so she could feel better. I asked that she go see the nurses and receive her dose of methadone then return to speak with us. And she did just that.

When she returned I could readily notice that she was in a better state. Her mood was more stable and she was more willing to talk. I asked her if she had eaten anything yet that morning. She said no. I pulled out a chocolate chip cookie and offered it to her. Her expression was like I had handed her a $100 bill.

I sat there and practiced mindfulness in the moment. I noticed her expressions, I noticed what she chose to wear, and the buttons on her jacket were of a particular curiosity to me. As she spoke about how she was feeling and how it was difficult to even get out of bed on some days, I became more curious. What kind of person was underneath all this pain and sadness? What passions did she have laid hidden within that once brought happiness to her and those that witnessed it?

The more I expressed my curiosity the more she began to open up.  There was a pin among the several on her jacket. This one sat alone on one of the lapels. I asked what this solitary pin meant to her. She told a tragic story of when she was held captive in a cage by a human trafficker. Her story made my heart ache. Tears welled in her eyes as she told the story.

I asked about her passions and what had made her happy in the past. She spoke of journaling and drawing. We spoke about her holding this tragic memory inside and not releasing it, either through therapy or (and/or?) as a new blog. I suggested to her that she find support groups and begin to get her voice out and release the pain. Her affect brightened greatly as we spoke.

So initially, I was thinking I would be met with an angry and hostile young woman, pushed against the wall for most of her life. What she probably expected from me was equal hostility. When met with caring and real curiosity, she immediately became a different person. I truly believe if you meet with a person facing trauma with true curiosity and willingness to listen and be mindful of every moment during the conversation, the deeper reality of the person comes through and the real work truly begins.

You don’t need to be a licensed counselor to learn how to listen. All it takes is paying attention to the person, their words, physical presence and whatever else piques your curiosity. Even a small pin on their jacket.