Two men were walking on a trail when they came up to an old woman standing at the edge a river. She asked the men if they could help her across the river. One man looked to the other. They agreed to take turns in carrying her. One carried herr to the middle of the river and then passed her over to the other man. She was not a petite woman. It was a struggle for both of them.
On the other side the second man to carry her put her down gently. She thanked both men and walked on her way. As they walked, the first man to carry her began complaining of how heavy she was and what a chore it was. He said his back was aching. He complained for a good while before noticing his friend was not saying anything.
“Were you not struggling to carry her? Why are you not complaining about this?”
The first man looked at his friend and said: “when I came across the river, I put her down, it appears that you are still carrying her on your back…”
(this story is a variation on a Buddhist monk tale)
The Journey of a thousand miles 